To Live or Die for Attention? (Hint: One Sounds Better)
I recently came to the realization of what I have long heard and understood: that all negative energy, including emotion and physical illness, is an attempt to get the attention – essentially love – of others, and to get them to do what you want them to do but think you can’t or shouldn’t or aren’t allowed to do yourself.
There has long been a drive in me to teach, as well as what I thought was an ego-based urge to be liked and to get attention. Of course, everyone wants to be loved because love is wonderful and peaceful and secure. What I found when I put the pieces together is that my desire to be liked and to get attention were just stunted versions of my soul drive to engage with others in a successfully positive way.
As I have written elsewhere, one of my solution methods is to turn the negative behavior inside out, or to invert it. Thus wanting to be liked or loved becomes a realization of a desire to appreciate and express love for others. Wanting attention, presumably for personal benefit, becomes wanting to embody value for others to benefit them. And all negative patterns and behaviors are employed by the confused and misinformed ego as means to get that attention.
One issue I’ve had was fear of some serious illness. When I really looked at myself regarding this I applied my understanding and awareness that I was wanting attention from others, including having them show love for me by helping me in my distress. Now, illness is itself a rather costly endeavor on many levels. It’s a rather inefficient way to get attention as you generally can’t enjoy the time together and neither can those who might be stuck supporting you. Overall it doesn’t produce a great experience for anyone. So it clearly doesn’t have much to recommend it even within the ego’s observed goals in creating illness for attention.
So what to do about this negative motivation? What if the Universe somehow totally blocked you from getting any attention for being sick? My thought was, well then I would just not get sick and would heal myself of it as it was useless to me. Bingo! This is exactly what ACIM teaches: that all illness vanishes when it is no longer seen as useful. Applause, applause.
So, what do to about this desire for attention? Again, invert it and you can see it’s a desire to engage positively with others and to embody value for all to benefit. So I turned that desire into a drive to accomplish things that would indeed attract attention to the value I aim to embody in my life. This itself was a turn around for me as for a long time I had thought it was a virtue to deny one’s value, as if that was humility, but now I see that a light must shine and be allowed to shine out where it can be seen because that is what a light is for.
If I have any value to offer, and I believe I do, I have to show it and allow that to bring attention to myself. Let the chips fall where they may. I know that all truth is of the Creator, and will state it. I know also that the Creator may express truth and value through my embodiment, and that my embodiment is an expression of the Creator. My ultimate aim is to be a clear representation of the truth; that when people see me they see Him that sent me, not for my personal glory because that is impossible. There is no personal reality, and on that note hiding myself and minimizing my personal imprint in the world would just minimize what I have to offer.
So here it is, and here I am. I’m not here to worry about what others think of me, but to busy myself presenting something of value for them to think about. Humble yourself but not the Lord through you. My goal is to be seen by as many as possible for what true value I can offer. If it brings me fame, so what. That only means I met my mark in service to the world. And I can get a lot more fame for being successful in health and all other areas than I could by getting sick. Besides, sickness and death are highly over rated. And unpleasant.
And another related note on getting attention and love: what goes around comes around. The world is a mirror. Actually, it’s you, and the love and attention you receive is the love and attention you give, perhaps in the value you give to others in some way. So fame is meaningless on the personal level. Just give because you love. That’s the solution. You can “get” a lot more love and attention in a long and healthy life than you can in a period of illness. Know you are loved because the world responds to your every wish. You are loved because love means connection, and connection means oneness.
Love and the mechanism of manifestation show us the Unity of all things. We are One. There is no other to beg love from. Give it yourself and know you are receiving it in the Oneness of all. Rejoice in your freedom and the innocence of all – this is the meaning of Oneness and of love. There is no better attention.